Dear drinking-in-the-afternoon self:

You are both a blessing and a curse. Needless to say that it is very fun to start drinking as early as possible, and have all day to do it. There's nothing like meeting friends at a bar before 4:00, and not stopping till 12:30 the next morning. You need to do this more often throughout the year. I have already decided this for you. However, responsible-you-work-the-next-day self thinks you are an idiot. I wish the two of you could reconcile and get along better. You share the same body for crying out loud! Learn to co-exist! Isn't there a happy medium that the two of you could agree on? I would really appreciate it if the both of you could just chat and hug it out. I've arranged a time for you to sit and discuss it over drinks. Say, 4:00 pm. today. at the bar.

Maybe you can talk about getting rid of dizzy-hungover self altogether. That would be great.

late,

Lou